I hope you are well as always.
Many of us need be kinder and more compassionate. Understood. However, I feel sometimes that love and compassion is perhaps misunderstood to lead one to think that we should put up with all kinds of difficult people in life (e.g. bullies of all sorts, abusive relationships, etc) and keep coming back to them with more love and kindness.
Sometimes people get into the Dhamma at a relatively young age and the youthful idealism and naivety of youth makes us misunderstand the purport or meaning of compassion. We think that no matter what someone does to us, we allow it and keep coming back to the person with love and compassion.
However, with age comes a (perhaps) better understanding. We realize that it is appropriate to set boundaries with people and even avoid certain kinds of toxic people if necessary, all the while trying not to have ill-will in our hearts and still wishing them metta and karuna, although from a safe distance.
So what do you think about this latter understanding? What does the Buddha's Dhamma and Suttas say about having boundaries with people and keeping a healthy, safe distance from especially toxic people (or cutting them out from our lives altogether if necessary), all the while not harboring ill-will and still having love and compassion for them as we progress on the Path? I feel that having boundaries with people and avoiding toxic people to safeguard oneself from their harassment and bullying is part of kindness to oneself.
In addition to a Dhamma/Sutta-based perspective, your personal take on the matter is always appreciated as well.
With metta.
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