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It seems like the craving for existence, the grasping for life/"a self" is the delusion at the heart of my suffering. If I didn't have that craving/anxiety/terror and clinging to "be somebody", separate and distinct, I wouldn't stress myself out worrying like I have done all this life (and all the others before this) to maintain life/status/health/etc. I'm feeling overwhelmed by all the lists of the Buddha's teachings, and wondered if there's something simpler I could focus on to help me progress on the path? I truly don't want to return to samsara.
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Dear Jeanmarie,
Agh! Samsara! Never again!
Yes, yes...
Let me dig through what has helped me in the past and I will get back to you.
Forgive me for taking time to reply. The forum being down, I had not checked it for a while.
With metta, Ven Upekha -
Dear Jeanmarie,
This response might be way out of date, and I'm sure you have found solutions yourself since - nonetheless, let me share some of what has helped me work with stress and worry - while being in samsara!
First of all, as we become aware of our attachment to 'being somebody', the self reacts with fear - as it is feels it is about to lose something valuable. So craving/anxiety/terror is a GOOD sign of the mind coming close to letting go of its baggage. I find this itself a relief. That it is part of the path.
That said, stress and worry also become a habit. A default reaction to things not going right. There are many ways to subdue these (all of the Buddha teachings, as you said!), and one simply has to try them out to find what works for you - and that will be different at different times.
In terms of something simple to focus on, I do suggest listening to Ajahn Brahm's talks / reading his books. He will quickly give you some simple but key teachings, because he just really repeats the same thing over and over again!
Actually, when you read the suttas, you will realise the Buddha too is also just repeating the same thing over and over again!
I know you feel overwhelmed by lists, but a 'list' that I find simple and practical, is the Dasa Paramitas - the ten perfections. There are many references online where you can find them. https://www.tibetanbuddhismconferenc...s-of-buddhism/ seems to be clear and simple.
I wish you all the best.
May you in no long time, come to the end of all suffering.
With metta,
Ven Upekkha
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