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Loving kindness and compassion

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  • Loving kindness and compassion

    I know I should having loving kindness and compassion for all living things. Buy my question is, how do I do this with my son in law miss treating my daughter? Any thoughts on how I over come my contempt for him. I don't wish him Ill will or anyone for that matter. But how am I to be a practising Buddhist when I have contempt for him?

    Metta to you

    Max

  • #2
    Just by putting this out there I understand the situation better. I think I can understand and deal with this within the Buddhist teachings.

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    • #3
      Greetings Maxeen,

      I recently listen to a Dhamma talk by Ajahn Brahm on this very subject.

      If you search through the Dhamma talk download section for Ajahn Brahm you'll find it. It is called something like 'dealing with abusive relationships'

      I hope it helps clarify things for you :-)

      With Metta

      Mara
      Last edited by Mara Pacers; 23rd-August-2016, 10:11 AM. Reason: Spelling

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      • #4
        Thank you very much and Metta to you ��

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        • #5
          /|\

          Dear Maxine,

          Welcome to the forums! Glad that you found your way here.

          One of the ways you can deal with the situation is to understand and accept that your son-in-law is a conditioned being and most of his actions have been acquired during his younger years. As a mother/parent, of course you would be concerned about your daughter and her well being. Most parents would out of love for their child(ren).

          Understanding that he has been conditioned, it is easier to forgive him and feel compassion for him. It's not him that you're having problems with anymore but his actions. This way, you can find ways to perhaps gently nudge him in the right direction. He is your son now no matter what. And what would parents do if they're child(ren) was/were misbehaving? Just approach this situation with kindness and you will see what you need to do. Maybe you can find out why he's treating her like that? From there, you can support them both.

          Finally, there will be things that would not be able to have affect on. Accepting that, it will be easier for you to just watch and be at the ready and open up your arms for them when they both need you.

          May you be well.

          in mettā,
          russ

          /|\

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